Delayed ejaculation: sexual intercourse too long
Delayed ejaculation is a recurring difficulty in achieving ejaculation, despite an erection and a sexual excitation phase “normal.”
The primary delayed ejaculation (which has existed since the onset of sexual life) is distinguished from secondary delayed ejaculation (which appeared after a period without difficulty in ejaculation, often following a traumatic event). It can also be described as global, if it persists in all circumstances, or transient when it occurs only in certain situations.
This is a relatively common disorder even though it is difficult to obtain reliable statistics. A study published in 2003 showed that about 5% of men said they had experienced a period of at least 1 month without reaching ejaculation. According to another study, more than 20% of men have already suffered a delayed ejaculation (more than 25 minutes). Most people affected by this phenomenon say they need to concentrate on getting to orgasm and feel anxious about “not getting there”. It is common to see them simulate orgasm to end a sexual relationship that is too long and has become exhausting.
Generally, these men are considered “good lovers” until their partner ends up complaining about it because of a lack of emotional sharing. Ejaculation without orgasm is an even more advanced form of late ejaculation: Man never manages to ejaculate or orgasm.
What causes for delayed ejaculation?
One of the most probable causes is the taking of medications, especially antidepressants, anti-psychotics or anti-hypertensives, which tend to delay or block ejaculation. Alcohol is also a possible factor of delayed ejaculation.
Physiological causes should not be ruled out: with age, the sensitivity of the glans inexorably decreases, the threshold of ejaculatory reflex rises (the excitation must be stronger to achieve ejaculation) and the refractory period (minimum time Separating two sexual relationships) becomes longer. In this case, the modification of the sexual scripts is necessary to reconnect with a pleasant sexuality.
Neurological causes (dorsal marrow lesion, diabetic neuropathy, multiple sclerosis) and surgical sequel are possible, but generally the causes of delayed ejaculation are psychological, especially in young men. These usually come to ejaculation in case of masturbation. The main sexual organ being the brain (because imagination plays an essential role in sexuality), men with delayed ejaculation of psychological origin, can suffer from various psychological disorders:
- Exaggerated concern to do well or look good that results in difficulties in expressing emotions;
- Rigid personality refusing loss of self-control leading to lack of abandonment
- Severe prior trauma, sexual or not (infidelity, accident, etc.);
- Maternal representation of the woman leading to the fear of “fouling” the partner;
- Presence of homosexual or paraphyliques fantasies (sexual practices absolutely necessary for sexual arousal).
These psychological problems are not exhaustive and the consultation of a psychologist or a sex therapist is indispensable to the understanding of the disorder. Psycho-sexual therapies will be considered to regain a satisfactory sexuality.